ibpatti32's Cancer Blog
March 18, 2008
| We are all important and a good support group is truly essential | Views: 84 |
I had not been online here for a few months and when I did sign on and read that I had even more new supporters which really touched me, it really made me realize how important we all are and to have each other to talk to about our various treatments because I know that there is just so much we want to talk to our family about it over and over. Whereas in my situation I have been divorced for 21 years and just a very recent empty nester and with my kids so busy with college and my sons in the military, when we have the opportuinity to spend quality time together I absolutely DO NOT want the topic of discussion to be about leukemia or anything involved with it. It really hit be hard when my daughter, Laura, 21 and will be graduating college on April 29 with a double major and a 4.0 gpa said to me that she has no memory at all of a time that I wasn’t sick. That broke my heart for she was a mere 8 years old when they tested her as a possible bone marrow donor along with my sons. I don’t want my kids to just have the thoughts and memory that Mom is always sick. I have tried as much as possible to discuss as little as possible. When I had to go in the hospital in February I didn’t call my children until I was getting discharged. Perhaps some may think that is odd, but my daughter is student teaching right now along with working and that last 6 week crunch of her senior year and I just don’t want to distract them from their commitments. I try to have my makeup on and dressed when they come over. I only want them to not worry and to have good thoughts and memories of their young lives. Thanks to everyone here that has suuported me and especially Jill that works so hard to keep this site running for us and Sherri and really would like to know more about your quilts. I hope everyone enjoys their day, though the sun is not shining here perhaps it will be shining in your hearts.
We are all important and a good support group is truly essential, 
3 comments)
06.22.08 - 
Thanks for your support -
Patty – you are so sweet. thanks for such a nice post. I am sorry you have been battling this for so long.
Your blog really touched me…I would give the world to have a mother to visit. I would give the world to remember a life with her, sick or not. You have been strong for so long and continue to fight.
I am proud of you! I don’t know you, I may never meet you, but for being a mom, even in your illness I will be forever proud of you.
I will pray your peace and your health and your continued love with your kids
Mac
Dear Patti; You sound like the very essence of my Mom. I think of her every single day since she left this world in 1970 at the age of 46, I was 20. She battled breast cancer for 7 years and back then it was much more of a brutal ride, I do remember that part. She was always worried about me, my brother and of course my Dad. She tried to shelter us from her pain and despair being the great actress that she was but I think it was terribly exhausting for her to be like that. I guess she thought that would spare us from the terrible plight she was experiencing but in fact we felt very helpless cause we thought she didn’t want to talk to us about her cancer so we just kept quiet. Not a good thing for her or us. I hope you can see that my story has a reason for being typed here. Your children now adults, would rather have you here than not. They would rather you share than exclude, they would be hurt if they thought you conived to spare them news of any kind that has to do with your illness. It may seem right and selfless of you to do that, but in fact you grow stronger when you share no matter what the outcome, no matter what the pain. It became clear to my Mom and me that during her final year we becase so close because she realized that I wanted to be let in to her heart no matter what pain or cost to her or me. So you see that is one side of a story that you might want to contemplate. I love her dearly for that. She treated me like an adult so I could go on in the world without her being by my side but always in my heart. That was her gift to me. I pass it on. May you find strength with your Cancer battle as I see you have lots of courage. Prayers from Weeze in Canada eh…